MEDITATIONS FOR QUIET TIME

From the book, ‘A Spiritual Psalter by St. Ephraim the Syrian

Meditation #27: Do Not Lose Heart. There Is Hope, And It Is Christ.

Do not lose heart, O soul, do not grieve; pronounce not over yourself a final judgement for the multitude of thy sins; do not commit yourself to fire; do not say: the Lord has cast me from His face.

Such words are not pleasing to God. Can it be that he who has fallen cannot get up? Can it be that he who has turned away cannot turn back again? Do you not hear how kind the Father is to a prodigal?

Do not be ashamed to turn back and say boldly: I will arise and go to my Father. Arise and go!

He will accept you and will not reproach you, but rather rejoice at your return. He awaits you; just do not be ashamed and do not hide from the face of God as did Adam.

It was for your sake that Christ was crucified; so will He cast you aside? He knows who oppresses us. He knows that we have no other help but Him alone.

Christ knows that man is miserable. Do not give yourself up to despair and apathy, assuming that you have been prepared for the fire. Christ derives no consolation from thrusting us into the fire; He gains nothing if He sends us into the abyss to be tormented.

Imitate the prodigal son: heave the city that starves you. Come and beseech Him and you shall behold the glory of God. Your face shall be enlightened and you will rejoice in the sweetness of paradise. Glory to the Lord and Lover of mankind Who saves us!

Meditation# 120 How many times have I promised, yet every time I failed to keep my word. But disregard this according to Thy grace

Grant forgiveness, O Lord; send also strength. Convert me, that I might live in sanctity, according to Your holy will. Sanctify my heart that has become a den and dwelling-place of demons.

I am unworthy to ask forgiveness for myself, O Lord, for many times have I promised to repent and proved myself a liar by not fulfilling my promise. You have picked me up many times already, but every time I freely chose to fall again.

Therefore I condemn myself and admit that I deserve all manner of punishment and torture. How many times have You enlightened my darkened mind; yet every time I return again to base thoughts! My whole body trembles when I contemplate this; yet every time sinful sensuality reconquers me.

How shall I recount all the gifts of Your grace, O Lord, that I the pitiful one have received? Yet I have reduced them all to nothing by my apathy—and I continue in this manner. You have bestowed upon me thousands of gifts, yet miserable me, I offer in return things repulsive to You.

Yet You, O Lord, inasmuch as You contained a sea of long-suffering and an abyss of kindness, do not allow me to be felled as a fruitless fig tree; and do not let me be burned without having ripened on the field of life. Snatch me not away unprepared; seize not me who have not yet lit my lamp; take not away me who have no wedding garment; but, because You are good and a lover of mankind, have mercy on me. Give me time to repent, and place not my soul stripped naked before Your terrible and unwavering throne as a pitiful spectacle of infamy.

If a righteous man can barely be saved, then where will I end up, I who am lawless and sinful? If the path that leads to life is straight and narrow, then how can I be vouchsafed such good things, I who live a life of luxury, indulging in my own pleasures and dissipation? But You, O Lord, my Savior, Son of the true God, as You know and desire, by Your grace alone, freely turn me away from the sin that abides in me and save me from ruin.